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a combo of lipo, tummy tuck, unicorn blood and masterful makeup application
Jan.06.10 // 11:37 pm - HAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$%%%%*&


In an effort to make you feel more welcome, I thought I'd kind of run over some of the basics of this community:

  • We're here for laughs. Seriously. We know the internets are serious business, but leave that shit at the door.
  • WE LOVE IT WHEN YOU POST! There's no limit to posts, and we're never going to tell you that you post too much. Well, unless you're full-on spamming the comm. Then we might. However, if your posts encourage interactivity, then we welcome you to post whatever you want, from gifspams, polls on your favorite sexy peoples of the world, music movie or tv show recommendations, NSFW posts (as long as you use a cut, bro), or interactive discussions about a range of topics from some interesting news story you found to your favorite flavored condom (the answer is always cherry). WE'RE VALE TUDO RULES HERE, KIDS. ANYTHING GOES.
  • bitchery may inspire an all-around feeling of madness and anarchy, but that doesn't mean you have to be rude. Respect the other members.
  • If there IS an incident of unpleasantness that you would like to report, please page-a-mod and we will handle the situation as soon as humanly possible.
  • BTW, your moderators are bloodyknuckles, choke, tamgerine, theshea, and robssexhair. We love cookies, Stella Artois, the concept of the Snuggie, and you. ♥

A full and fresh copy of our super cereal rules can be found in the userinfo, so if you're thinking of joining you might ALSO want to read those.


Jul.06.09 // 3:25 pm - Bitchery FAQ
the Bitchery FAQ

Please read below before asking questions.

1. I was invited.. why? And where did you find me?

You were invited because we, the moderators of bitchery, found you through a community or one of your friend's profiles and thought you were awesome and might enjoy being a part of this community.

We don't only invite people we know personally, and if you wouldn't like to be a part of bitchery you do not have to join. :)

2. I was invited, but my "Manage My Invites" page is empty. What happened?

This is either because:
A. The queue was completely full and we needed to remove the invitations so that another moderator could invite some people.

B. We invited you days ago and you hadn't rejected or accepted, so we canceled your invite to make room for another.

This does not mean you are no longer invited.

Either join the community manually, or ask for another invite here.

Jun.15.09 // 9:28 pm - Welcome to Bitchery!
Welcome to bitchery!

Having recently gone through a bit of lame online ~drama, Phoebe, Jade and Tam got to thinking about how there were really no communities to discuss random, lulzy and at times srs bsns topics without having to deal with many assholes or power trippers. We wanted a community that offered you a chance to discuss whatever you want without fear of repression or ass-hattery. Thus bitchery was born.

Had a bad day? Had a fucking fantastic day? Green Jello vs. Red Jello? Have a crush on some actor/actress/someone at school or work? Had recent drama and want to bitch about it? What are your thoughts on politics? Abortion? Twilight? Zombies? Religion? Need new music recommendations? bitchery is where you'll be able to discuss all that and more.

Now read the rules, make sure you understand them, and apply for membership. When (and if) you're accepted, jump right in and start posting and commenting!

If you'd like to be a doll and promote bitchery in a community or your personal journal, you can find a copy & paste-able code here.

Before You Apply...

Please make sure you have read and understand all of the rules.

1. Don't be a twat.
This community is called BITCHERY, but that doesn't mean you can be a bitch to other members. This means no racist, sexist, ageist, homophobic or flammatory comments and/or remarks. No attacking other members at all. If your brain is bigger than a walnut, you should know by now how to debate and discuss something with another person without resorting to arguments and/or discriminatory comments. Repeat offenders will be smacked hard upside the head with the almighty b& hammer.

2. No promotions without permission.
Whether you mod a community that discusses midgets in tights or why the Jonas brothers suck ass, we're pretty sure someone else in bitchery is interested as well. We're all about being friends, making friends, getting to know each other, etc. If you have a wicked cool community that you mod or are a part of and want to promote it, run it by one of us mods.

Chances are you'll be able to promote, UNLESS it's a rating community, then it'll be rejected and you'll be mocked by the mods & the community. If we see that the only time you contribute is to promote your community (whether it be in the comments or multiple posts), you'll be deleted and b&. There are plenty of other promoting type communities on lj; try one of them.

3. Post as often as you'd like, but make your posts interactive.
As it was stated in rule #2, we're all about making friends. There's no need for a "drive by post" (those posts that allow for little to zero interaction between members). We want to discuss. We want to talk. We want to bitch. If you are inquiring where to find something or need help in a post, for the love of god, make it interactive. The mods will have no problem deleting a post or asking you to edit if it is not interactive.

4. About introduction posts.
Meeting and getting to know people can be really fun and exciting, so introduction posts are allowed. That being said, take a look back at rule #3 and apply it to this rule. If you post an introduction in the community, please make it interactive. Introduction posts are notorious for being posts that other members can't participate in, so please make your introduction post something other members can participate in. Again, re-read rule #3 and you should get the picture. And if you don't.. well, you're fucked.

Membership Requests:

We're not a picky bunch, and while bitchery is fairly new, we are well aware of the precautions we need to take in order to keep this place a fairly drama-free community.

That being said, we will not be accepting membership requests from:

1. Brand new journals.
2. Journals with barely any, or no, posts.
3. Journals with very low, or no, comments posted or received.
4. Journals with almost no, or no mutual friends.
5. Journals that are members of almost no, or no communities.

We also reserve the right to reject membership based on our own discretion.


Page-A-Mod @ bitcherymods

Phoebe: choke / PM
Jade: bloodyknuckles / PM
Tam: tamgerine / PM

When trying to contact a moderator, please page-a-mod before PMing us. Thanks!
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